Jesse's Travels » Laos

Photos of Laos

admin — Sat, 06 Feb 1999 11:24:27 +0000

Thoughts on Laos

Thoughts on Laos

admin — Fri, 05 Feb 1999 04:20:54 +0000

Where to start, not to sure, I guess with maybe an overall itinerary of what I’ve done. Got into Laos mid December tocapital city vietienne. Didn’t like Vientienne much as a city but metthis cool NZ girl, Welsh guy and 2 Japanes guys and we went out to aLaos disco, very funny. It was her birthday so we got very drunk,danced away with the Lao, fun night. Next day I met this Spanish guynamed Antonio. I;m not to sure how to convey the amazingness of this guys guitar playing, he’s a flamenco guitar teacher, been playing for25 years and was absolutely amazing. Had no idea where to go and hewas heading for this place called Vang Vieng which was only about 4-5hours away so I thought why not and went off with him to Vang Vieng. This was a good choice as I septn the next 2 weeks in Vang Vieng.Vang Vieng was a small town, a little bit overrun with westerners,which was good and bad. The countryside around was really beautiful, I’ll just have to show you some photos. The place is surrounded byall these caves in the mountains around. Went caving a few times,this was a lot of fun. There was this one really beautiful cave thatI went to a few times, really large, had a reclining Buddha at theentrance. Outside of the cave there was a swimming hole, aquacoloured water, really cool. On the way back one day I saw fantasticsight, which was later explained to me buy someone, not to sure who. There was this line of boys and girls throwing balls backward andforwards between each other. Apparently this is a courting ritual anddepending on how you throw the ball and how much attention you paywhen the person throws the ball to you determines whether you like theperson or not. This guy got a big knock back when I was walking past,this girl threw this ball as hard as she could, cracked him right inthe ehad and fell over, it was hilarious. One day I hired a push bike and went on 35km ride, heaps of fun. Every town I rode through all these kids would come out and shoutsabadii which is hello. Stopped ata few places for a drink, they aregorgeous people the Lao and they really like to drink, all day longdrinking Lao beer then hitting the Lao Lao (Laos whisky) at night. Had alook at my map then realised I was really close to this cave, so headed for it. It was very good choice. Met this Lao guy who took meinto this cave, we crawled and walked for about 20-30 mins then got tothis underwater river, had a swim, which was excellent. Veryrefreshing and amazing swimming in the dark, actually probably closerto dog paddling, was really really cool. Went down the river next toVang Vieng in tire tubes from trucks which was hilarious, did ittwice, very funny, spent about 3 hours floating along. Probably the main thing in Vang Vieng was ‘THE DEN’. Run by a lovelycouple who procurred the substance that the region is famous for. Spent a lot of time in there, from 6-7pm onwards everynight, met somereally cool people in there, wish I could remember the conversations,but what can you do. Met some really excellent westerners in Vang Vieng, which was notreally my plan but turned out that way. One night I met this reallyinteresting Norweigan guy and we were talking about irony. This was atopic of converstaion down on the islands with Tom, at that point intime I thought I did not understand irony, not to sure now. But he thought that irony which goes hand in hand with lack of belief was oneof the hallmarks of our generation. He thought that irony hidesfeeling and taking a stand on anything because you can always turnwhatever you have said into an ironic statement. Food for thought fora night. Met some interesting Isralis as well. After talking to themI think I understand to a certain extent why they tend to sticktogether, and you can only talk to them, when it is one on one. Thisone guy was explaining to me that, from his persepctive, there are 700 million people all around Israil who want him, his family dead andtheir land and there are only 5 million Israil’s 1.5 million of whomare Arabs. Met this really cool Danish couple, they gave a very glowing decription of Denmark. They are traveliing on money the government gave the guy because who smokes too much!!!!!!! Hows that the government gives him disability money cause he’s stoned too often. Of the westerners that I met the ones that blew me awaymost were the Americans. I’ve had a pretty strong anti-American biasfor a good seven years now so it was good to have some ingrainedstereotypes blown away. Met this really cool guy Mat, lots of fun andreally down to earth, not obnoxious or in your face, excellent guy. On the 30th of December we headed down to to Vientienne together. Ihad to extend my visa, took ages stuffing around so I missed the busback. Which was excellent cause I met this Laos guy Ho, he invited meback to his place, spent the night getting drunk with him and hisneighbours, which was a lot of fun. It was amazing though as everyonegot progressivly more drunk the set of social rules never broke down. The one I’m referring to is this massive deference to elders, if anolder person went to speak everyone else would shut up, it was amazing. I reackon alcohol is pretty good in these circumstancesbecause they barely spoke any English and my Laos was at about 20words then, you can just laugh and do drunk things, that break downthe language barrier. Do not think I’ve turned into a major drinkerthough, its just been af ew times a week, which by holiday standardswhere you’re trashed all day and night long isn’t bad I reackon. Hotried to marry his sister off to me. It would not be hard to pick upa wife in Laos, so many marriage proposals. They are so clean as well, which I guess goes for all Asian people when juxtaposed against us. Ho kept on spraying me with his deoderant which was pretty funny at the time, in hindisght I have been thinking I really should be some deoderant, cause I don’g get to wash my clothes very often. I only have 1 pair of pants and 2 t shirts, its just that I hate deoderant I reackon its so dirty. They were incrediblyfriendly as well, crashed the night at this place then caught the busback to Vang Vieng for new years eve. New years was a lot of fun, didn’t sleep for a few days, got very veryvery very wasted, I think I made for good entertainment for the Lao. Always a little bit worried when I get too wasted in another culturenot to offend anyone, I hope I didn’t. The sunrise for the new yearwas amazing, so beautiful dancing around in the middle of this river,only knee deep, with Mat drumming away. Too many things happened towrite them all done in this mail, a lot happens when you go a few dayswithout sleep, met a lot of people, can’t remember what we talkedabout. Made some mildly appliable resolutions, no more tobacco, cutback on the smoking to the weekends when in Australia, become a bitmore conscious of my actions in terms of other people and theenvironment, more responsible for myself (I’ll put this one off for awhile longer in hindsight), read a few novels. I went to two weddings in Vang vieng which were really fun. It wasfanastic the way the Lao danced, guy would ask girl to dance thenthey’ld face each other off and dance around in a circle, reallyfunny, had a few dances with some beautiful lao women. Evryone getsreally spastically drunk.Figured after a week in vang Vieng I should check out somewhere else,so popped up to Laung Prabang which is this beautiful beautiful smallcity or large town north I think about 7 hours. Then headed offsouth to Savanaket, spent about 5 days really dazed and confused. Went backwards and forwards along the same route too many times, causeI forgot to do a few things with email and etc. etc. Just massivedisorganisation. Finally got things together and organised and wastrying to figure out what to do with my last week. I had one reallybizare experience in Savanaket met this Lao guy who’ld just left themonkhood in the arvo and organised to have dinner with him. Went backto my hotel then walked off to meet him, but I got really really lost. Normally I never got lost with directions, but I walked for aboutand hour and a half when it was a 15min walk, it got dark and I wasstumbling around somewhere I didn’t know at all, then I got accostedbuy this guy who changed my view on sex and gender in about 10mins. After meeting this guy I reackon people are definelty born male orfemale cause he was meant be born female for sure, but something gotstuffed up. I’ve never met such a queen before, outdoes every queenI’ve ever met in Aus by a factor of 5. It must having been ahilarious sight me wandering around lost with this Lao guy who wasn’tmeant to be born male hanging off my arm, with this crowd of girls following on there bikes. Finally got rid of him and grabbed a tuktuk back to the hotel. Figured should just go anywhere that was not in the lonely planet, which incidentaly I hace decided I will never purcahse or travel withagain, a maps this best way. I swapped my lonely planet for a map ofsouth east asia, which has been far more useful, light and smaller. Of course this led to my best expereince in Laos, I jumped on a bus,not to sure where I was going, jumped off at this town that had ahotel, Muang Phin, spent a night in the hotel then next day met thisreally cool guy Vanh. Spent the next 4 days hanging out with him and his friends, cruising around on their motorbikes, ahhhhhh I want a motor bike, but in a way its pretty fucked with having to wear a helmet in Aus, you don’t get the same effect. Had my best time so far, learnt heaps and heaps if Iwrite it all down in this mail I’ll overflow your mailbox. One night we went to this wedding, got very drunk on Lao Lao. It was interesting the way the Laos deal with everyone been really blotto. Same same but different to Aus. Same same in that the women don’t get so wasted and try to make sure things don’t go to out of hand. Different in that the Lao make a much bigger effort to avoid conflict, where in Aus I think many revel in it. Was interesting when Mon, one of Vanh’s friends, got a bit out of control, after much talking and physical restraining didn’t bring him down, one of his friends slapped him on top of the head a few times. The head been spiritually the highest part of the body this is quite denegrating and he calmed down for a while, stopped trying to take on the bouncers which was probably a good thing since they had guns. Although its hard to imagine they would be that useful, so old, they’ld probably kill the shooter, blowing up in their face. Similar setup in terms of the other weddings I’ve been to except that been a fair bit more remote than Vang Vieng I was far more of a novelty, which worried me because I did not want to upstage the bride and groom. It is both amusing and painful with the kids, they are so funny the way they all just sit there and stare at me hour after hour, it doesn’t seem like they blink either. Talking of kids earlier in the day we ere riding around and went to this village where this hilarious ensued. We were going to see a friend of Vanh’s. When we got off the bikes everyone under the village under 16 came charging, screaming towards us, it was very funny watching about 100 kids streaming and screaming towards me. Then they stopped about 3m short of me and just stood staring, all attempts at communicating with them was met with shyness. They are so beautiful the Lao people, they are very shy, especially in comparision to the Thai or Vietnamese. Maybe I should fill you in a little a bit Vanh. He is same age as me, but had a pretty different life experience. When he was 13 both his parents died so he went and became a novice monk in the monestary and spent 10 years there, and has just left cause he couldn’t handle been celibate. He’s now living with his sister’s family, his sister’s 14 years older than him. He’s been looking for work since he left the monestary cause he wants a wife, he said its of upmost importance to Lao women how much money you have, which you can understand given that the husband is going to be bringing in the money and once you are married you’re not really going to do that much paid work. Unfortunately he hasn’t been able to find any work, the government has no schemes to match open jobs with the unemployed. There is no work in his village so he’s been looking for work in Savanaket, the problem is though he’s only been able to get into Savanaket once to look for work cause of the restriction on the cost of the bus ticket, $US3 return. So when I left I paid for his fair into Savanaket and back to have alook for a job. He’s in such a bind. He says he wants to be reborn with a long nose, white and in the west. I can’t help but think that is so sad, to have to wait til the next life. He said he has thought about taking his life to maybe hurry up the process but obviously hasn’t. This is not to say he is massively depressed or anything, he has all the time in the world to do what he wants, which he likes, but he can’t do much because he has no money. Its been heaps of fun with Vanh and his friends, Mon and Wong (or Mr. Wong as Vanh calls him). Wong is absolutely hilarious, I’m not exactly to sure how to describe him. He’s very cool, when I say this I mean he projects a very collected air, a fantastic cook. I bought all the food for the time I was there and he cooked it. Vanh and his friends tried to set me up with a few Lao girls but unfortunately nothing worked out, fun all the same though. It’s a fantastic thing when you click with someone, and especially so when it is with someone froma different part of the world, same same but different, with the focus on the same. The family dynamics are fantastic. Vanh and his friends move between houses of relatives and each others friends relatives eating and sleeping at a different house nightly it seems, the communiality (is this a word) is absolutely fantastic. Like all Lao they live in houses that are raised off the ground, enough for them to walk under but unfortunately not for me as the bumbs on my head testify to. They are a pretty poor family, Vanh’s brother in law is a small time rice farmer, as most Lao are, which means that they don’t go hungry except in the case of really bad weather. They’ve got four of the most beautiful children I think I’ve ever seen, makes sense though both Vanh’s sister and brother in law are stunningly beautiful. They’re children did drive me a little batty though, so many hours of staring at me, but I guess I’m providing a lot of entertainment which is good, I need to learn some sort of language bridger or art to show them. I guess its not going to be a musical instrument, maybe I can learn juggling and travel around with a few liight balls. They do not have a toilet which was tricky, I had to do commando operations to escape from the kids. They are not obnoxious in anyway, quite adorable really, just I’m used to having that personal space where no one is around and I can think away to myself. I bought Vanh’s sister 5kg of rice for having me. It’s a funny thing even though Vanh’s sister’s family are very poor they still have a TV, although its black and white. One night when we came back there was an incredibly bizare sight of the whole family sitting and watching the static on the TV and thouroughly entertained. Vanh told me this other really interesting thing that fits in with my overall impressions about the gender relations in Laos. Whereas in the sub-continent it is classic patriachy. When the woman gets married she leaves behind her family and takes on the family of her husband, and gets bottom rung, in Laos it is often the other way around. Muang Phin was an amazing place, it seemed like a real communist party stronghold, for half the day news and the national anthem would blare out over the town, so many national flags and so many military people. Its understandable, it was the Communists who were fighting the Americans and there was half of a crashed american plane in the middle of the town. They have an enormous monument towering over the town to the 1975 revolution. There is a primary school in town which was hilarious every time I walked passed they would all come streaming over shouting ‘farang’ (foreigner) and something else that aparently means long nose, very funny. It has been good talking to Vanh about Laos Buddhism, up to this point in time I’ld learnt very little. He said in the monestary he’ld wake at 4am every morning followed by 1 hour of meditation then 7 hours of general schooling, maths, history, etc. then another 1 hour of meditation, an hour or two of discussion about Buddhism with one of the high monks and they’ld have 2 meals. The monks seem to rpovide a general education to the local community, boys only. This is paid for by the community in that every morning they go around and collect sticky rice and other contributions. Becoming a novice monk is something that most boys seem to do. I read George Orwell’s Burmese Days, which had an intersting observation in it that this really dodgy Burmese guy was going to cancel all his rapes, murders and the like, in a karmic way, by building lots of pagodas and giving money to the monestary, this has given me a new outlook on the more impressive pagodas around. Some other random observations on Laos. Transportation is fantastic. The whole country seems to be run by these disel motors from Japan, they power these carts, they power the ploughs in the fields, the generate the electricity. The buses or trucks are fantastic, trucks converted into every type of moving device. The ingenuity is fantastic. The school girls are so beautiful riding along with umberallas to protect them from the sun. Now that I’ve filled you on what I’ve been doing I think I’ll go into my thoughts on Laos. It took me about a week to start slipping into Lao life. At first I found it a bit boring, not challenging or exciting like thesub-continent but after about a week I started slowing down andstarted to appreciate the underlying complexity. Each day I spent I fell in love with the Lao people more and more, soso beautiful. The main thing that I have got, in an intellectual way, from Laos is there emphasis on social harmony. I guess this is a typical east Asian and South East Asian thing, but in Laos it is nothing like it is in Vietnam or Thailand, it is amazingly pervassive. The Lao have so many mechanisms to ensure that all runs smoothly, first and foremost been the whole thing with loss of face. Getting angry is a major loss of face and I saw it with westerners who lost it, the Lao reacted very negatively towards them One of the other things that has struck me is how chilled the Lao are about what has happened to them. Most recently the American government was bombing them before that it was the French and variously over history the Vienamese, Chinese and Thai’s have invaded. Yet there is no resentment, that I could detect. This got me thinking, the Lao do not seem to have a very hierarchical society at all, in comparision to the feeling that I’ve got in the sub-continent, in Thailand or here in Vietnam. Maybe it is that the people by not engaging with various oppressors just living their lives is the best defence. The Vietnamese organised heavily to fight off the French and Americans this did not happen anywhere near to the same extent in Laos, or this is the feeling from what I’ve read. If you respond to someone or another groups attempts to engage with you then you engage very much on their terms. The Laos but not engaging don’t end up getting changed or been oppressed because I think they have chosen not to engage with these various hostile forces, they have let them play out there there little insignificant power games they do not not go over into the next life. Ultimately I think in many ways it is quite post-modern, or maybe it is my years of university been put on to the Lao, but hierachy ultimately requires the consent of the subjegated to the truth set that holds that hierarchy together, maybe the Lao are the ultimate post-modernists they implicity realise that ultimately subjegation lies in accepting anothers truth’s. Half baked thought, tell me what you think. It has been interesting thinking about Laos nationalism, smailiar to Bangladesh in many ways, similar contradiction in my thought. I came into Laos thinking about it after emailing this guy Vil I met on the net, he’s Lao and very much I think into nationa building. It is the same contradiction in my head, on one hand I think the nation state is such crap. In Australia what binds me to the other 18 million people, nothing, its an imagined community. Yet on the other the tools of nationalism are a very powerful tool for binding people together into a highly displined tool for elites to use for there own purpose. It has been an amazing tool when used in the west to dominate the world so how can we deny it to formely subjegated people. In many ways its hard to imagine this is a communist country. Laos is not the place for western ideologies. It is communist in a way in that to me the essence of communism or socialism is social justice. Because the family structure is so strong the support structure is fantastic, yet on the other hand the state does nothing for the people, Vanh gets no help at all. It is pretty much a straight capitalist economy, in many ways more so than Australia in a classical sense. I mean by this the state does not seem to involve itself with the affairs of business but when it does it does it in a good way. Telstra, Australia telecommunications company, laid the phone lines down over Laos, then when they had finished they talked to the Laos government about setting up the exchanges and becoming the countries carrier but the Laos government turned around and told them to leave the country within ten days. Go Laos, that made me so happy, screw Telstra. But in terms of the domestic economy as far as I can tell there are flat tax rates on business, not dependent on turnover or profit. People own their businesses, the land that there houses are on. I guess the major difference been with the west is that the state is not there for the purpose of increasing profit for big business. Really it is more of a mildly authoritarian state with socialist pretensions but a straight small sized capitalist economy. Unfortunately the institutions of death and destruction are making there way into Laos, I refer of course to the World Bank and IMF. I was reading that the Laos government together with these 2 faces of evil have mapped out a development plan for Laos. The areas on which Laos is going to ‘develop’ (ahhhhh what crap) is going to be through logging (it is amazing the amount of forest cover in Laos, truly staggering), hydroelectricity to make Laos the battery of south easy asia, this will be done through flooding valleys and dams, becoming a cross road through which China, Thailand and Vietnam can trade and lastly but not least in terms of destruction tourism, bloody toursists. Ahhhhhhhh development, or de-development it should be called, or destruction, cultural anhilation. A few people have said to me that Laos is like Thailand was 20 years ago. In Vang Vieng in 1 week three new restaurants opened. 1999 is Visit Laos Year, so the tourists are really going to pile in..ahhhhh such a contradicition in my mind, I hate the effects of tourism yet I am one of them. I hate the thought of us changing them yet that is so paternalistic. The Laos can look after themselves, they can make up there own mind about ‘developing’ yet on the other hand they are sold an irresistable sell. The marketing men of the west are geniuses, truly scum of the earth. This contradiciton in my head is probably manifested itself most in terms of visiting the tribal areas. On one hand I really want to go and see this existence which from all reports is so amazing, yet too many years of university studying the way the west has subjegated peoples around the world through such concepts as the ‘other’ and so forth has left me in a big dilema. And anyway I think they should be left to there existence, if I go there I will be just jumping in before the same thig happens in Laos as in Thailand with the tribal people. Tours will march through, take photos, the people will be subjects to be categorized and dissected, exactly what I’ve done with the Lao people in this email. Ahhhh the contradictions. I resolved it by not really resolving it by staying in the dilema I could not go to the tribal regions and as a result have still not seeing any tribal life in any of the countries of been to, probably for the best. They have a really chilled way of life the Lao. They have one day off work a week, Sunday and what night do you think they party, not Saturday night so they can recover on Sunday but Sunday night. Sunday is spent recovering from the week so they can have heaps of fun on Sunday night then recover at work the next day, a much better setup. Ahhhh I love travelling, I really don’t want to come back to Australia but it is only one more year, then I can head off indefinetly. I really love Asia, I think I was Asian in my previous 20 lives then something fucked up in this one and I was born white. I think one of the things I really like about travelling is that it brings out the contradictions in my thoughts and beliefs far more so than in Australia. Everyday I am confronted I can choose to deal with and conquer it or fail and exist in it for another day. Its great reinventing yourself and travelling on my own is perfect for it. I can test out new ways of relating to people, see how they react. Who I want to be at this exact point in time I am, there is no baggage, except the baggage in my head. I really should travel better though, be more conscious of my impact, I don’t drink coca-cola anymore, pepsi a bit though. And moving I think I should not move but I am stuckj with it now, given my tight schedule, I’m going back to Aus sometime in March,.noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Current plans are really up in the air but I was thinking of going back to Laos in the next two weeks, but I’m enjoying Vietnam heaps, this is a really fanastic country, the Vietnamese are sooooo much fun, so I’ll probably end up staying here til my visa runs out mid feb then making my way to Cambodia for a week to check out Angkor Wat, then down to Koh Phan Ngan for one last Thai full moon party, then in March maybe meet up with my father, maybe go to Laos for another two weeks, I would like to go to Bangladesh for a few weeks, everywhere except Australia. I’m thinking I should use the July break from uni to go to Indonesia for 2 months and skip the first month of uni. Some last thoughts on travelling, I have to remember that all my best experiences travelling have been in places where there is no toursit attraction, when I’m lost, I should focus on this with my travelling. Ultimately all I want to do is meet people, temples and sights don’t really do it for me. Learnt a fair bit of the Lao language as well, got up to about 40 words, so could have very basic conversation.

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Laotian brothels

admin — Fri, 29 Jan 1999 04:14:18 +0000

"Jesse, Jesse Buck, is that you?" I face slowly came into focus, a girl, what was her name, an association with my memory, from where and what time. "What are you doing here?" That was a good question, I needed to ask myself, collect myself, the haze covering my brain suggested serious drug use, as did my position on the floor, a wooden room, others scattered across the ground, the best in a semi-conscious state. A neuron or two fired I knew her from university, she was a heroin addict, we were in an opium den, I needed to throw up. We engaged in conversation, a fluke meeting to bring me back to reality and a glimpse at my state of self destruction. I had been there for the last month, on my first stroll through town I had been beckoned by a middle aged lady outside a dodgy unlit house with the promise of coca-cola. I entered the only business in the world that specialize in coca-cola to find what I had been expecting and looking for, plastered people all over the floor. It wasn't my reason for going to Laos, but traveling is about cultural experience, when you are in the golden triangle it would be an act of callous tourism not to indulge in a touch of opium. The cultural exchange had gone particularly well, I had been there a month, had developed a relationship with the owners, I arrived at 6pm, an hour before they opened, she fed me noodle soup, he gave me a freebie to start and I then threw up her food and settled into a night of smoking away my student allowance. It was time to move on, I had spent to long in this place, one night I had stumbled out to see a party across the road, music and drunk people everywhere. In I stumbled to be accosted by some Lao guys who sat me down and started pouring some Lao Lao into me. This extremely toxic brew of rice wine varies greatly in strength, its home made origins providing a lucky dip of drinking. I found the Lao to be shy but very friendly, and once they have a had a few drinks most generous. I was seated, they took my glasses off and we passed around the same cup doing shots of the stuff. My stomach, brutalized from bad hygiene and opium could not stand it, I ran off and threw up not discreetly but not at the table. I had been there 15 minutes and it was time to call it a night, surrounded by smiling drunk Lao I had a wave of anxiety that I might be in a dangerous situation. This was confirmed when the Lao guy who had accosted me told me he was a cop and that this was a police party, not my scene. He refused to return my glasses and insisted that I continue to drink, I continued to vomit until I was dry reaching, i tackled him for my glasses and stumbled off. I was lost in a cave, riding along on a bicycle, struck off it by beautiful Lao girls riding along holding umbrellas to protect them from the sun, kids running into the street to say point at me at scream foreigner with big grins. Lines of boys and girls throwing balls backwards and forwards in a bizare courting ritual, the way you throw the ball determines you level of interest, a girl throwing the ball as hard as she could straight into a guys head. Swimming in underwater caves, a new years eve that went on for days under the influence of of some Burmese amphetemine, crossed with low grade heroin that made me wired, delirium making me stupid and a reasonably low level of embarssment due to black out. This had been the extent of my cultural experience, I need to know more. Tracey's incursion into my haze had broken my stupor, I bought a block of opium a bag of weed, packed my bag and got on a bus going south. I must leave these tribal people with there opium smoking ways and find some straight people to engage with. I didn't want my Laotian adventure to be a purely wasted one, there was a culture and a history to engage with, to try and understand. I bused down south til I found a town that looked good, a broken journey with a few nights spent in cheap hotels with a cheap hooker in each offering her services. I can't remember the name of the town where I got off, just the name of the hotel, it was Hotel Poudaladi. I had broken the spell of Vang Vieng and had escaped the opium den but I felt like a night of destruction in my hotel room would not be out of order. At the reception she sent me to the top floor, I had barely closed the door, a knock and a girl of maybe 18 entered, into the shower, she washed herself down, came over and kissed me then sat on my bed. She was asking for 5000 kip, less than a dollar, still I couldn't bring myself to pay for sex. This is asia, everything should be bargained for, even if you're not going to purchase, its part of the cultural experience I told myself, I started low, zero kip, she was offended and starting ranting at me in Lao. From my primitive understanding of the language I could not tell exactly what she was saying but she was pissed off. The situation had started to bore me, I demanded money from her for the fantastic privilege of been fucked by the Buck, she stormed off, leaving me in no doubt that she was unhappy with proceedings. I decided to ruin myself and become acquainted with the toilet. The woman that ran the place came and knocked on my door a little later, she had the most beautiful smile, full of life. That boundless smile that few are possessed with that enable them to look brightly on all situations. We did not have any deep intellectual conversations, nor did we engage about Laotian culture, we had a few laughs, she taught me more Lao and we had a few very discreet kisses. Over the next few days she gathered that I did not want to leave my room, she brought me food and water generally stopping me from descending into the full squalor I knew I was capable of. She changed the sheets, left me to destroy myself during the day until on maybe the fourth or fifth day she brought me some truly bad food. I think it was pork, it was off, I ate it without knowing and had some serious gut movements. My days started with my opium pipe, followed by a joint followed by another pipe. I had so much opium I was struggling to make a dent in this block, eating it rolled up in rizzla's, slathering it in joints, plus going the traditional pipe. It had completely blocked my plumbing, I hadn't shat in days, sustenance went in and out the same hole. This left me little way to process the bad pig, I wouldn't say I was in pain but I knew something wasn't right. She realized things were going wrong, she spent the night in my bed, on the wrong side of the mosquito net, my pleas for the health that she could give me were rejected all night. The next morning I was woken to a barrage of high speed Lao, in a pitch, tone and volume that did not suggest happiness. She was standing at the end of the bed with my bag of weed and block of opium, tears streaming down her face "Why Jesse, why?" My words are better on the page that from my mouth, my defence was feeble, I didn't seek atonement, I insisted there was nothing wrong with these drugs, distance was quickly established, she left me to my squalor, she would only deliver food and no more. The seventh day came and like God I thought I needed a rest and a health kick. A morning off, I needed bowel movement, I couldn't continue to excerise my inards via my mouth. To the toilet and finally I was pointing the right way. There is somethign so wrong about goign ehad first into a toilet, especially a squat-a-matic. It was time to figure out where I was, I had skipped on engaging with the culture yet again, down the stairs I headed, women were everywhere, all done up in their finest...hmmm...maybe no their finest they were done up to entice the more amorous aspects of a man. I thought I had walked into heaven, I sat down, out came the mini-disc and we engaged in a conversation I still have but have never listened to out of acute embarassment. Then a guy walked in picked a girl and went off with her, then another guy, then another. It all became clear, i had been staying in a brothel for a week without realizing, time to move.

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