Uzbekistan

From the totalitarian freak show of Turkmenistan to the backwater of Uzbekistan, no gas or oil, Islam Karimov, the president until assassinated has turned on his own people. Uzbekistan made it into the world news earlier this year when the army massacred over a thousand demonstrators. Still this country seems positively liberal by comparison, the police accept bribes in a much more professional manner at the periodic police checkpoints, Karimov, illiterate and the product of ugly parents cannot cover the country in his portrait and has resorted to double speak slogans on the cheapest of billboards. This country has three great boasts, birth place of the black plague, Samarkand and Bukhara, historical seats of Islam, and Timur the Lame, their one great leader who sought to outdo his purported grandfather Genghis Khan in brutality. The waves of invaders appear in the multitude of faces, eyes narrowing, blue eyes, Iranians, Russians, Mongol, they have been raped and massacred by everyone. An article I read suggested that 4% of central Asians are descended from one man who swept through the region nearly 900 years ago. Samarkand and Bukhara are two cities who rose to prominence as transit points on the Silk road, amassing fortunes to build the most superb Mosques and Madrasses I have seen. Amazing tile work, ala Iran, depicting mythical animals on the edge of Islamic sensibility. This was the great age of Uzbekistan, Samarkand and Bukhara were important seats of Islamic learning, yet for the poor pillaged Uzbeks these cities are Tajik, the people speak Tajik, the Uzbeks are farmers and nomads, speaking a Turkic language whilst the Tajik’s speak Indo-European Persian. The signature I have attached to my emails is from a Tajik mystic Jalalidin Rumi "Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there." Uzbekistan is covered in the remnants of the Soviet disaster, ancient cars with a sprinkling of Daewoos, the Koreans are making a grab for Uzbekistan. The president is attempting a de-Russification of the country, replacing the Cyrillic alphabet with a Roman one. They are in a time warp of 20 year old Russian fashion, the entire country closes at 5pm, guys wear pointed cowboy boots, leather jackets and leather hats that are design free. The Soviets and Stalin followed a well worn path screwing the Central Asians, he drew jigsaw borders on one drunken night to divide up the troublesome Islamic region of Fergana Valley between three stans. Since independence they have been periodically massacring each other over this issue. No oil or gas, the presidents daughters own the banks in which the ATM’s don’t work and the hotels which are empty. The highlight of the capital, Tashkent, is the standard issue Soviet metro. I entered the city to watch a fight between two obscenely drunk men, one dumped into an open sewer his head kicked as he struggled to figure out what was going on. Later on the head kicker was on the ground crying, the sewer dweller recovered and started kicking him in the head. I saw an old man walking his sheep and two guys walking their horse, this is a city of a few million people. This country is not a complete disaster, they have excellent colourful bazaars, no more sugar in tea, noodle soup and the approach of the east. The west is barren desert and the east leads into beautiful snow covered peaks. When they are not locked in disastrous Russian fashion the men are wearing long blue dressing gowns and the women are in an eye pleasing clash of colours. Visas are easily obtained for most neighboring countries and after the drought of Iran I got my hands in some booze and have been getting drunk on Uzbek wine and sampling Afghani opium. Cow and sheep fat are a delicacy and it shows in the peoples bodies. I feel a little sorry of the Uzbeks, Genghis Khan murdered whole villages and towns, they had slave markets deep into the 19th century, their leaders threw people from minarets, the great leader Timur, whose statue adorns parks is remembered by the amount of Uzbeks he murdered, the country is double land locked, by Turkmen standards they aren’t even a proper dictatorship and their country was created by Stalin. Borat is an Uzbek not a Kahzak. I few extra amusements from Turkmenistan, they have a ministry of fairness and following is a list of some of their national holidays: Drop of water is a grain of gold day Horse Day Day of revival and unity day Turkmenbashi Day Bread Day Good Neighbourliness Day Neutrality Day Election of the First President Day Carpet Day Melon Day I’ve uploaded some photos from both these countries.  I'm write this from Kyrgyzstan where they pretend to be a democracy, it all feels a little lighter here.

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